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Beach bodies in Malta

Is it May already? OMG!

Summer is at the doorstep!

What to do when we realise that summer has come and our bodies are not ready for it? Two obvious choices would be Diet and Exercise.


Of course, the first instinct is to start a diet. Diet! Which one to choose? Which one delivers what it promises? Guess the best option would be THE DIET which is in fashion during the month of May!

Then we suddenly realise that during May 2017 most of us will be attending all the meetings and parties and morning coffees and whichever event our favourite political party is organising before the election. Attending these events means drinking beer and eating pastizzi or pizza or deep fried hamburgers bic-chips from the mobile vending carts.

From the looks of it dieting will have to be left for after we go out celebrating our party’s victory of the election! 



Ok, so if dieting has to be put at rest for a while, the next best thing is exercising. Again the dilemma is which type of exercise will burn the most calories and transform the winter fat into a killer body to show off on the beach. Too many to choose from. The go-to preference would be joining a gym, having a personal trainer would be ideal of course. 

Cause let’s be honest, we all like paying the membership and showing off the gym card to our friends.  We all indulge in the glory of telling our admiring friends that we will be committing ourselves to going to the gym to work out with our own personal trainer.  The first let-down (if not the reason to just quit) is the personal trainer telling you that results won’t show immediately, the journey to having a toned body is long and entails a lot of sacrifices…..including dieting!!! 

That’s it the gym can go to hell… we’ll manage some exercise at home or something (yeah right!) 

At this point, we’ve just given up on having a killer beach body to show off.  We’ll have to wait till next year to have everyone stop in their tracks to look at us walking along the beach heading for an ice-cream or a hobza biz-zejt. 

All we see is white skin and…..CELLULITE!! Horrific!!  

Got it! Buying new swimwear will put our spirits up. Off we go to the stores going through endless lines of bikini options. We finally find something that we like. We go to the changing room anticipating the thrill we’ll get once we try the bikini on and see ourselves in the mirror. We get in, start undressing and low and behold…..what happened to our skin during the winter?! All we see is white skin and…..CELLULITE!! Horrific!!  

Sun tan!! Yes, that’s it…..a glowing golden suntan will solve all our problems. It’ll mask the cellulite and make our new bikini look fabulous on us. But surely we can’t go to the beach to get that tan.  The home roof/garden/terrace will have to do. After all, we’ve seen worse happening on Maltese roof-tops recently!


10. Naomi Cortis

09. Tara Ebejer

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08. Mandy Saliba

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07. Angie Vella

06. Madeline Baldacchino

Tumblr mood 💞

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05. Lara Vassallo

04. Sarah Zerafa

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03. Strana Canning

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02. Valentina Rossi

01. Marta Fenech

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